In 2009, I found myself abandoned once again; this time with three little girls. I was forced to face every hidden wound as well as pick up the pieces of a broken marriage. During this season and a brief period of reconciliation, I became pregnant again. I was broke, broken, working three jobs and trying desperately to rebuild my life. I have always felt that I carried a miraculous measure of God's grace inside of me. This time grace, was what carried me and the fire that was meant to destroy - renewed me. I understood for the first time in my life how wide and deep is the love of God. I was reborn. I was tenacious and determined to become the woman God intended me to be and the mother my children deserved. This was truly one of the darkest seasons of my life and I look back on it with joy and gratitude.
I spent the majority of my childhood in the Ozarks. I grew up climbing trees, playing in cool, clear creek water and swimming in the Buffalo River. I learned to hear the voice of God in the stillness of my natural surroundings. My childhood was was not as idyllic as my environment. I was abandoned by my mother when I was three and by the time I was four I was being sexually abused. The abuse continued until I was 13. When I was 14, I came close to suffering a nervous breakdown. My abuser was not punished and I was forced to live in close proximity to him and "pretend" like I was ok. My self worth took a major hit as I didn't believe that I was worth protecting or fighting for. Much of who I was and who I aspired to be were carefully hidden away and there it remained until I was almost 30.
“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.”
— Søren Kierkegaard
My personal mission is to "Give them tools to overcome". More often than not, hurting people are all still living with past family trauma. My heart's desire is to see people heal and overcome their past so that they can sow seeds of healing and love into their family's future.
A woman on a mission
I am ridiculously in love with my family. My children are my treasure. Becoming a mother is truly one of my life's most profound blessings. My children have taught me more about myself and the world than I could have possibly imagined. They gave me the strength to push through hardship when I had none of my own.
Dominic and I were married in early spring. Thunderstorms completely surrounded us, yet it barely sprinkled on half of our guests. As I stepped onto the aisle, the sun shone and the rain stopped completely. Do you believe in signs? I do.
I still get butterflies when I spontaneously bump into him in town.
He is the love of my life.